You’ve seen the signs coming on and off the freeways, right?
“Will Work For Food. God Bless.”
Well, here are some the ones you’d see from today’s stars…IF they were holding signs by the on and off-ramps.
JOHN MAYER: Will stop being a total douchebag for food. …PSYCHE!!!
HEIDI MONTAG: Will stop getting plastic surgery for food. “Uh, paper or plastic? My favorite, please…PLASTIC!”
PARIS HILTON: Will “eat meat” for food. Like - oh my god!
NICOLE RICHIE: Will eat something for food. God bless.
JESSICA SIMPSON: whill Lurn howe too sphell four food.
PRESIDENT OBAMA: Will be more specific for food. God Bless America!
JOE BIDEN: Will shorten my sentences for food. See apparently people think I elaborate too much on issues that don’t really know much about. I say they’re wrong because everyone knows something about something, and if they don’t, well, then they can learn something from nothing! See where I’m getting at? No?! Okay well…God Bless Ya Anyway.
BETTY WHITE: Will Run For US President For A Snickers Bar. God Bless St. Olaf!
MEL GIBSON: Will Pretend To Like Jews & Give Back A Quarter of Malibu For Food. God Bless Non-Jews.
ANDREW WISOT: Will Stop Writing These Stupid Posts For A Job. HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*****
This post is purely a parody and for entertainment purposes only. Yes, of course Mel Gibson doesn’t hate hate Jews.
Andrew Wisot is a freelance writer for The Jay Leno Show The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and an US Weekly Fashion Cop who’s “between jobs.” Andrew will blog for LOLs until he’s employed again or 50,000 miles, whichever one comes first.
Email: andrew@willblogforlols.com
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