What I’d rather be doing right now than look for jobs

Get a root canal…without novacaine.

Get thrown in a jail cell with Suge Knight, Mike Tyson & the 18th Street Gang.

Get a prostate exam — by Suge Knight, Mike Tyson & the 18th Street Gang.

Walk barefoot in a field of razor blades, thumb tacks, and knives.

Watch the entire Oscarcast — again.

Have hot sauce porn into my eyes.

Eat cake with toothpaste icing.

Pick out hairs from people’s doody.

Be forced to eat a meal inside a public beach restroom.

Vacuum cars at the car wash and have each ex-girlfriend drive up and go, “Andrew?! You work here?!” 

Get driven around by a blind person who just suffered a heart attack.

Solve math problems.

Throw out my back…during The Running of the Bulls.

Go “girls” shopping…

…followed by a double feature of “What A Man Wants” and “The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.”

Go down in a jet filled with screaming babies.

Drink tap water.

Get tickled on my side.

Go back to my last job.

*****

Willblogforlols is written for entertainment purposes only. No screaming babies were harmed in the making of this post.

Andrew Wisot is a freelance writer for The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and an US Weekly Fashion Cop who’s “between jobs.” Andrew will blog for LOLs until he’s employed again or 50,000 miles, whichever one comes first.

Email: andrew@willblogforlols.com

Advertisement

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

3 Responses to “What I’d rather be doing right now than look for jobs”

  1. jessie Says:

    lol…hi-larious!

  2. Jim Says:

    Hey I feel your pain Andrew but you just gotta keep looking.

  3. Myesha Sidhu Says:

    howdy i read your web logs all the time, you have numerous tremendous things to say. My readers would like your manner, do you imagine you could be a guest blogger for me?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

Gravatar
WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.